I am that typical girl. That girl that alone in the US, shares the same name with at least 14,251 people!! I'm the typical American girl with overweight singed on my forehead. 90% of people in the world have brown hair and brown eyes. Just. Like. Me. I'm the 121 millionth person in the world to suffer from depression.
Depression, I used to think that, at a time with no identity that I could have depression as my identity. That depressed girl named Maddy. Yeah well the 4 other people next to me have the same thing.
How come, I can see the amazing importance of everyone around me but not in myself? How come I have to be like every other person of 7 billion people? I wouldn't even know where to start to be different. I don't think I can be. I'm too normal.
What is the importance of living if I can just have the girl next to me do the work? Why do I keep spending 10 hours a day of my life studying stuff that I really doesn't have any importance in my life? Why do I have to work all day to just get money to feed myself and have a roof over my head? Why is it so hard? Why can't I just go in the wilderness where my place is natures place. Where I can just live. I can hunt and harvest my own food. Where I don't have to listen to people telling me go to college, get married, have children, die old. Where I'm not forced to dress a certain way in fear of being punished at school for it? Where, I can just be free. Where I can feel happy and live for myself and not live the typical life. Get good grades, go to college, get married, have children, die old.
I sometimes feel like if I can't live the way I want to live because of this stupid world thinking we must have government controlling everyone and have other people harvest and hunt our food, or build our own homes. I mean seriously, most people don't even know how they would even survive in the wild. That's sad considering all the other animals live just fine and from what I can see, are happy.
I'M BORED, DEPRESSED AND NORMAL. Just. Like. You.
